Q: What separates flight attendants from the scum of the earth?
A: The cockpit door!
Q: What is the difference between a flight attendant and a jet engine?
A: The jet engine stops whining at the gate
Q: How does a blind parachutist know when he's about to hit the ground?
A: His guide dog's leash goes slack.
Q: How does the Airbus A340 manage to climb?
A: By the bend of the earth!
Q: Why does the Pope kiss the ground each time that he lands ?
A: Did you ever fly with Alitalia ?
Q: What is the ideal cockpit crew? .......
A: A pilot and a dog...the pilot is there to feed the dog, and the dog is there to bite the pilot in case he tries to touch anything.
Q: How many pilots does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Just one. He holds the bulb and the world revolves around him.
Q: How do you know if there is a pilot at your party?